Everyone wants to leave a legacy. We all want our lives to count for something and for someone to remember us when we are gone. The legacy we leave tells a story about the life we led; what we valued, how we lived, and where we invested our energy. Let's look at two different legacies and the story they tell.
Legacy #1 includes: a U.S. Vice-President, a dean of a law school, a dean of a medical school, 3 U.S. Senators, 3 governors, 3 mayors, 13 college presidents, 30 judges, 60 doctors, 65 professors, 75 military officers, 80 public office holders, 100 lawyers, 100 clergymen, and 285 college graduates.
Legacy #2 includes: 7 murderers, 60 thieves, 190 prostitutes, 150 other convicts, 310 paupers, and 440 who were physically wrecked by addiction to alcohol. Of the 1,200 descendants that were studied, 300 died prematurely.
The first legacy belongs to Jonathan Edwards. Edwards is considered by many as the greatest theologian in U.S. history. He was also a devout man of God, a pastor, missionary, philosopher, educator, and, as testified by his legacy, a devoted husband and father. Edwards and his wife Sarah had eleven children together. Every day when he would come home, he would spend time talking with his children. Despite his demanding schedule, he was also faithful to spend a portion of his day in prayer for his family, specifically praying a blessing over his children.
The second legacy belongs to a man name Max Juke. Juke was a lifelong criminal who lived around the same time as Edwards. His family tree gained the attention of researchers because at one point there were 42 men in the New York state prison system who could be traced back to the family tree of Juke. When the legacies of Juke and Edwards are compared side-by-side, the contrasts are glaring.
How do we begin to make sense of the disparity between the legacies of Edwards and Juke? I think we need only look at the lives that they led. One man sought to live his life in obedience to the lordship of Christ. The other was a hard-living, hard-drinking fella who always seemed to find himself in trouble. Over the years, this comparison between Edwards and Juke has taken on a life of its own as a bit of an "urban myth". The legitimacy of the facts in regards to Juke have been questioned by some, but appear for the most part to be pretty accurate. To be fair, I'm not sure how exactly to verify much of it. However, I think that focusing too hard on the numbers misses the greater point to be seen.
Statistics tell us a lot of things. They say that children who come from broken homes are more likely themselves to get divorced. Likewise, children who grow up impoverished are likely to continue to struggle in poverty throughout their lives. But what does all of this really mean? Did Edwards' and Juke's life choices set the fates of their children...and their children's children? Do our circumstances really determine the course of our lives???
As a husband and father, I have learned two things...primarily the hard way. First, I learned that despite my best efforts, I have no control over the eternal fate of my children. Regardless of how well I do at shepherding them, sharing the gospel with them, and training them in righteousness, I don't have the power to guarantee their salvation. At the same time, my ability to love my wife and children well, to serve them sacrificially, and to model biblical manhood for them doesn't ensure that things will go well for me or for them. Conversely, my shortcomings and failures don't doom them.
My best (or worst) efforts don't trump the sovereign purposes of God in the lives of my wife and children. What my efforts do though, as I believe we see in the legacy of Jonathan Edwards, is serve as the means that God can (and often does) use to bless my family. In other words, I believe that God blesses our faithfulness and obedience to his commands. When we seek to honor our marriages and train our children, God is faithful to reap a harvest from our work in sowing good seed.
The second thing I have learned is that in order for my horizontal relationships to function well, I need to first make sure I am adequately maintaining my vertical relationship. When I seek God first in my life, then I am in a good posture to be able to sacrificially love and generously invest in my family. It is not natural for me to be selfless in my attitude toward others. I need the power of the Holy Spirit to reorient my heart and mind on the things of Christ if I want to model him and the power of his gospel at home.
So, clearly, the key to leaving a lasting and meaningful legacy, to raising happy and healthy children, and having a successful marriage is to be a Christian! Right!?!? Well, not exactly. All of us can surely provide an example of a healthy, loving marriage between two non-believers that would put many Christian marriages to shame. Likewise, we know many non-believers who are great, responsible parents. We can't just generally believe that every Christian will leave the legacy of Jonathan Edwards and every non-believer's family will turn out like that of Max Juke. A lot of things happen along the way, and a lot of choices led to each of those dramatically different outcomes. If we view the Christian life, especially in regards to marriage and raising a family, as a "magic bullet" that guarantees us happiness and success, then we are setting ourselves up for disappointment when our expectations go unmet.
When I love and serve my wife and edify my children in obedience to scripture, my motivation shouldn't be my love for them. It shouldn't be my desire to leave a lasting legacy. My motivation should first and foremost be my affection for Christ. Don't get me wrong, I love my family more than anything on this Earth. And I desperately want to leave a meaningful legacy. But what undergirds all of that is my love for Christ as my Savior and the Lord of my life.
The gospel tells me that I am approved by God, through the righteousness of Christ, even when I stumble and fail as a husband and father. The gospel tells my wife that she is dearly loved by a bridegroom who will has given himself up for her. The gospel tells my children that they are adopted in Christ as sons and daughters of their perfect Heavenly Father. The gospel gives us the power to love our families as Christ loved his Church, and the grace to keep at it when we fail to do it well. The legacy of Jonathan Edwards isn't as much the lineage that followed him (although that is a powerful testimony of the grace of God towards the Edwards family), but rather it is the one life that was transformed by the power of the gospel for the glory of God...his own.
In Grace,
Chris Morris
If you missed this week's sermon (or just want to listen again), follow the link below to listen. Or subscribe to our podcast in iTunes.
Part 8 - God's Design For Family And More
Questions discussed in this sermon:
1. What are Paul's instructions to the family unit?
2. How does our parenting impact the kingdom?
3. Does the Bible advocate for slavery?
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